finding your way in the darkness — buying wine is a b*tch.
DECISION FATIGUE
Quite frankly, choosing a wine can feel like a stumble around in the dark. Not many of us have someone like Mo Koski from Apéro on speed dial to gently direct us toward a glass that gives us everything we were looking for. So how do we manage on our own and how do we stop being bullied by the bottle?
Firstly, wine has one fundamental role and that role is to be delicious. End. Of. Story.
The trouble is it can be pretty hard to know if a wine is delicious without opening the bottle and this can be made harder when you’re buying for the squad. Chances are they have differing tastes and there are few opportunities to try before you buy when you’re loafing about in the wine isle.
Shopping in a fine wine store is a pretty good place to start. Although not guaranteed, you are much more likely to experience success there than if you just buy off the shelf in the supie.
Generally (hopefully), there is someone behind the counter who knows what’s what and can ask a couple of questions to gauge what might be your perfect match and point you in the right direction.
Your local wine store may also have tasting events where you can pop by and sample something you’ve not tried before. (insert subscribe button to By The Bottle here)
Often wine buying occurs, post work day, when you’re already shopping for dinner, the rotisserie chicken and feta cheese are in the basket and you’re stumped on what wine to buy to go with it. Additionally, you often can’t be arsed with the effort of choosing and you just want to get home to graze and imbibe or the kids need bath, book and bed and you don’t have time to muck about. Decision fatigue is a thing, y’all.
HAVE YOU GOT STYLE?
A good place to start is think about what style of wine is going to be fit for purpose. Are you looking for a yummy wine to share with your mates or is it chucking it down outside, freezing cold and you need a cockle-warmer? Or is it humid, you’re sweating at the very idea of leaving the air-conditioned car to tackle the weekly shop and all you can think about it is slugging something crisp and refreshing?
Once you’ve connected your brain to how your body is feeling, consider your budget. Got an idea of what you want to spend? At this point, you want to ask a staff member to guide you if you’re in a fine wine retail store, and it should go something like this:
Dream hypothetical scenario — Fine Wine Retailer edit:
Wine Curious Shopper
”Hi, I’m after something so fresh I can feel the southerly breeze blowing in the vines from here, and I’ve got about $30 to drop on it”
Wine Curious Retail Assistant
”Excellent. Follow me!”
If you’re in the Supermarché, that dream hypothetical scenario will be a wee bit further from making it to the realms of reality but all is not lost. It’s what smart phones are for.
If you are navigating this extreme eddy on your own, do those first two steps — style and price — and now head to the section of the wine isle that has that variety you know you like. Grab that addictive little gadget from your pocket and pop a couple of the brands you’re looking at, then mine that cyber space sucker hard for which of those wine labels in front of you delivers the style you’re after.
Dream hypothetical scenario — Supermarket edit:
Wine Curious Shopper
”Ok - I want a wine that is fresh and crisp and tasty but I don’t want sweet. And I want the crowd pleasing Pinot Gris I know my mates enjoy — and I’ve got $30 to blow — and I can see Lawson Dry Hills, Wither Hills and Esk Valley are within my price point”
(engage search engine)
Esk Valley might be the way to roll here…
If I’m honest, I’d love to see wine removed from the Supermarket for lots of reasons, with the main one being exactly this example. Wine is such a beautiful thing, it deserves some curation — not just chucked on a shelf, left to linger if the wine label isn’t good enough to puncture the autopilot in a way that makes us buy it.
There are so many delicious wines out there, buying it with the groceries is not going to broaden your wine-drinking horizons and that means you’re missing out on some really good gear.
ROCK THE WINE BAR
A great way to combat the unknowns of wine buying is to try before you buy.
Head to your favourite local that serves a lot of good schizzle by the glass so you can take a wine for a test drive before you commit to a full bottle at the store. (At this juncture it is worth mentioning that a lot of wine bars and restaurants don’t like to list wines that are available in the supermarket but trying new things at your favourite watering hole, helps with selection indecision when you’re next headed for a shop)
Reading a wine-list can feel so foreign to you it may as well be written in Greek. If you see Assrytiko on the list that actually is Greek. It’s also fucken delicious and should be ordered immediately with a side of salty olives or an oyster but my point is often when we dine out, we search the wine list for something familiar because it’s intimidating AF and we don’t want to screw up.
The trouble with that is as soon as you see a wine you know and like on a list, you simply don’t see anything else. When it comes to tasting new stuff and broadening horizons, that doth butter no parsnips.
Generally, we behave this way because we so keen to get a glass of something - anything - in our hand so we can start the chats with our dining pals that we want to get that over and done with. Sometimes it could be because making decisions is hard and it’s your night out and you just want the beverage sorted so you can exhale before inhaling an alcoholic stress inhibitor. Those scenarios make sense. We’ve all looked to a glass of Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc or a Central Otago Pinot Noir for safety comfort. But what about looking to a primitivo from Puglia, Italy for a little intrigue? Or fuck it, what about a barrel fermented Sauvignon Blanc grown in Martinborough (like the Grava Sauvignon Blanc that is currently seriously blowing my hair back. Can recommend. Get amongst) By pushing that boat out, you’re more likely to set yourself up for a better buy when mooching about the moonshine isle at the grocery store.
So to summarise —
GETTING REAL IN RETAIL
— Say goodbye to the supermarket. Head to a wine-dedicated store and find a human who can help.
— Mix it up. Ask your wine retailer to put a mixed 6 pack together for you based on your personal preferences. Ask for three whites and three reds. Give an average price you’re happy to pay and then see what they come up with. Smart phone your way through each wine so you learn about it and the producer so you can add the wines to the ‘would buy again’ list or the ‘not for me’ list.
— Go to the in-store tastings. Most wine stores have the odd event showcasing a producer or new wine. Get along. They’re usually pretty good value for money.
— Read. See wine descriptions as guidelines not excerpts from The Bible. 9 times out of 10 you will not experience a wine the same way as someone else. Therein lies the magic. Wine descriptions can be the birth place of wine wank but when a winemaker tries to describe their wine, they use adjectives to clarify what you’re likely to expect. That’s helpful. It can sound ridiculous and sometimes it is. But walk in a winemaker’s moccasins - they live for people to love their wine. So read the wine notes as the poetic expression of the chemistry that inevitably is going to be in your glass.
we’re super grateful to our pals at antipodes water company. they supply us with the good water for our chats. antipodes is an artesian water that contains no chemicals, and when you’re pouring an organic wine that is gold. the mineral content also keeps the palate fresh so you can taste the wine the way the winemaker and nature intended you to. thanks antipodes, you’re the bomb. antipodes.co.nz
